The Krampus Before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas and I had been bad,

How was I to know that Santa might get mad?

The house was locked tight every door and every sill,

The fireplace closed shut to ward away the chill.

The night was all dark and I slept peacefully at ease,

Until my window blew open by some strange breeze.

I awoke with a start and went to close the panes tight,

Imagine my surprise as to what caught my sight.

From on high came a jingle and the crack of a whip,

I glanced up for a moment and nearly bit my lip.

Aloft rode jolly St. Nick on his reindeer drawn sled,

And below clung a creature with eyes that burned red.

The elf landed on my roof but stirred not from his seat,

Instead he drew his pipe and stomped with his feet.

“Krampus, oh Krampus, go forth you little blight,

And remind this young fellow to do what is right!”

Amazed I watched by the light of the moon on the lawn,

As the fiend crawled away with fangs that were drawn.

Like a shadow of shadows he edged to the smokestack,

And head first stole down the shaft, ready for the attack.

My first instinct was to hide and bar the door shut,

But I had to do something though I knew not what.

Between my door and the wall leaned my old baseball bat,

And thus an idea shaped to deal with this sneaky rat.

Quick as a flash, I took up my weapon of war,

And, clothed in my blue silk robe, I made for the door.

I flew down the stairs and alit upon the inglenook,

Waiting and watching for the beast to take the hook.

A moment passed with shaking knees and head that spun,

Yet neither claw nor soot fell from the hearth, not a one.

Then I saw it, charcoal footprints of the strangest sort,

Dread filled my soul then behind me came a snort.

I whirled about, brandishing my bat in the air,

Instead I was knocked off my feet, caught in the snare.

And then the thing pounced with animal ferocity,

Though I fought back with all my might and audacity.

As we grappled and clashed upon the fireplace rise,

I could not help but see those glowing ember eyes.

He was covered in oily black hair from head to toe,

And with large curving horns he delivered a blow.

I swayed where I stood but returned again to the brawl,

Lashing out like a madman I threw him at the wall.

The creature’s strength was that of three full grown men,

But I held my own as we sparred throughout the den.

Battered and bruised I strove to my very last breathe,

And fell to the floor awaiting my coming death.

For a moment I lay then opened my eyes to see,

A tattered and beat demon sprawled beside me!

“Good show my young friend, we’ve come to a stalemate,

I’ve never been beaten until this very date.

So I’ll give you a warning, one you should heed,

If you are naughty again the Krampus will succeed!”

Like a smoldering flame, he then vanished without a trace,

And I vowed that next year I’ll bring some aerosol mace!

To all you bad children, I have but one thing to say,

Beware the Christmas Krampus on this festive holiday!

- T. A. Nicholas

Apples and Oranges Occupying the Tea Shop

 I have a real bone to pick with today's politics. In the United States, all you have are apples and oranges: one side of the political spectrum fighting against the other. Why can't there be any pears or peaches that get into office? It's always Democrat this or Republican that. Did you know that many of the founding fathers were against a two party system? It was said that if the country were to become a two party system that the nation will divide itself. Isn't that what is happening?

       Scene at the Signing of the Constitution of the United States, by Howard Chandler Christy

            In 1780, John Adams wrote a letter that says: “There is nothing which I dread so much as a division of the republic into two great parties, each arranged under its leader, and concerting measures in opposition to each other. This, in my humble apprehension, is to be dreaded as the greatest political evil under our Constitution.”  

George Washington actually takes it a step further condemns parties of any kind in his farewell address as the president in 1796, “It (parties) serves always to distract the public councils and enfeeble the public administration. It agitates the community with ill-founded jealousies and false alarms, kindles the animosity of one part against another, foments occasionally riot and insurrection. It opens the door to foreign influence and corruption, which finds a facilitated access to the government itself through the channels of party passions.”

This may sound a little off topic but if anyone knows anything about Protestantism you'd know this one fact. Typically, when someone doesn't like what their preacher is saying, they'll either find another Protestant church out of the thousands; or they'll start up their own church. Now I do not believe in that philosophy when it comes to religion, but it makes perfect sense when that theory is applied to politics. If you don't agree with everything your party says, go join one that does, or if you have the time and money, start your own.
               By fractioning politics up like this, I believe people would become more united because then we are not all on one side or the other. Very rarely in history do you find wars with three or four factions all fighting against each other. Usually, they will fall in with either one of the main factions. Is that what we're doing; falling in with crowd? Despite having views and opinions that differ from the larger parties, we join them simply because we might agree with one or two sentiments and then hate the opposing faction because they aren’t supporting your ‘colors’.

               As our representatives continue to fight this "bloods and crips" styled war in our capitol buildings over whose ideas are better than the others, how much is actually getting done? Now I know that the phrase ‘nothing ever gets done in Washington’ is a laughable stereotype of our government, but in regards to the near government shut down that took place last spring and again during the summer, I really have to wonder if people’s views are getting in the way of doing what needs to be done.

From what I’ve read, the major obstacle that congress had was with a group of people who were so stubborn and unmovable in their views that a compromise between the two factions could not be realized until their demands were met. The group I am talking about is the Tea Party; an extremist right wing political movement that now dominates the Republican Party. In the end, the Government came close to a screeching halt all thanks to obdurate mind-sets.

More recently, the Liberals are getting their very own extremist group, known nowadays as the Occupy Movement. Though not nearly as well organized as the Tea Party was, it has gained followings throughout the world and continues to grow in both popularity and leadership/organization.

In truth, both causes, the Tea Party and the Occupy Movement have good intentions; however, it is the unyielding attitudes of both of these extreme groups that could plunge our country into stagnant waters. Imagine if the debt crisis in Washington, concerning the government shut down, were to have happened now with the Occupy mind-frame that the Democrats are adopting. I’m no soothsayer or prophet, but I’m willing to bet that no compromise would’ve been struck and we would find ourselves in a very difficult situation.

Extremism in any form, whether it is ethnic, religious or political, ought to be shunned and yet we welcome the political aspect with open arms. The way events are unfolding, I worry that things are slowly spinning out of control. We’ve been warned by our founders and now we’re seeing the result of the ‘greatest political evil under our Constitution,’ and the only way I see to halting this, as I’ve stated before, is to break down the political structure into smaller parties, bringing in some pears, peaches and grapefruits to the collection of apples and oranges, so that fringe politics cannot conquer so easily as it has today.

War of the Pandas

Here’s a little something that’s been on my mind ever since I heard about it and I want to regurgitate this so my brain can move on to other things. This past weekend was Blizzcon. A gathering of the nerdiest of the nerds to see what Blizzard Entertainment (i.e. the Starcraft, Diablo and Warcraft computer game series) has in store. The most anticipated revelation was what the next World of Warcraft expansion was going to be. One thing you need to know about me is that I used to be a huge WoW nut and still am to a degree. I don’t play it anymore mainly because the storyline or lore has grown stale and that, more so than the attraction of better virtual gear or constant reruns of the same dungeons, is what interests me most about the franchise. However, this fourth expansion into the gaming universe may temporarily reignite my interests. The name of said expansion is called The Mists of Pandaria, which will feature the anthropomorphic pandas called the Pandaren as the new playable race along with the all new monk class that other races will be able to play as well.

                Okay, I know what you’re thinking. A heavily Chinese inspired race of Kung Fu fighting panda bears sounds really familiar. But here’s something you might not know. In 2003, Blizzard released Warcraft 3: Frozen Throne, which was the last installmentof the Warcraft strategy games that preceded the MMORPG. In that game, you eventually run into Chen Stormstout, the first time a Pandaren is introduced in the game. Interestingly enough, DreamWork’s Kung Fu Panda launched production one year after said computer game was out and another four years afterwards until the movie hit theatres. I haven’t found any quotes of Dream Work’s executives saying that the movie was inspired from ol’ Chen, but it is a definite curiosity that the one springs up after the other. Now, I'm not trying to dis against DreamWork's movie. I loved the show and am really looking forward to the third one when it comes out. 

                In conclusion, the only point I am trying to make is that, despite what people may say about the new WoW expansion being a rip off of Kung Fu Panda, it was Blizzard who came up with the earliest published idea in the first place. It would be comparable to Seth McFarlane of Family guy claiming that Matt Groening of The Simpsons stole his idea. All I'm trying to do with this post is to show that the Chicken came before the egg, but that doesn't make the egg any less as appetizing than the chicken. So pass the KFC, pour me some of that egg drop soup, sit back and enjoy both renditions of an endangered species kicking back. 

Games in the Desert

Oy vey. . .what a week. My family and I headed down to St. George last Wednesday to visit my grandparents who own a home there. As it goes, I had this huge plan to ride my bike all the way to Zion National Park and take some awesome pics of the red rock scenery and write this giant sized essay on my travels. Unfortunately, I have this little known problem called chronic laziness disorder that shuts my limbs down and turns my brain to mush at the most inopportune times.  

                Instead of a long ranged, grit and spit bike ride, I sat around at the house using my brother’s new 3DS system playing The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time when he wasn’t using it. It is such an addictive game; you would have no idea unless you’ve played it before. It consumed me when I was ten years old on the Nintendo 64 and it has once again plunged me into the world of Hyrule with all of its crafty dungeons, memorable characters and foot-tapping music. The thing that reinvented the classic game for me was the clearer graphics (completely remade character models that look amazing!) and usage of the 3DS motion targeting system. Everything is pretty much the same with those exceptions but that’s all I needed!

                I did, however, get about five or so miles ridden while I was in the St. George area. The trails are fun, if not a little confusing at points, while the scenery evoked memories of Edger Rice Burroughs’ John Carter of Mars. On Friday, we took a cruise up to Grafton. A little known ghost town just a small ways from Zion N.P. where they filmed a portion of the old Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid movie. The real fun came when we visited the cemetery and I was able to hike up the path a ways and get some pretty nice pictures of the countryside. Those and a few I nabbed while on the road are displayed below.

                Well, that’s about it for my trip. Sorry it wasn’t as exciting and interesting as I aspired for it to be in my last post. One thing I can promise is an account this coming week as I ride my bike to Salt Lake City via Antelope Island and back. My brother, Christopher may decide to come along with me so it might have to wait until Saturday, but it will be happening this week guaranteed. 

O Brigham, Where Art Thou?

Ben Lomond covered in clouds outside my house in Plain City.

Today I took my bike out for a spin to see how it would handle on a quick journey. At first I was only going to ride to Willard Bay which would have been only a little less than seven miles, but when I came up on the turn that led to the bay park area, I just couldn’t call it quits yet and so rode on with my new goal being Brigham City.

With the exception of a saddle sore rear end, the trip was flawless. The hills of the fruit road, which runs at the base of the mountains, was arduous for someone from Plain City where the largest hill is more like a bump. I stopped twice on the way there and on the way back for no more than two or three minutes; just enough time to stretch out and drink some water.

The main stop I made in Brigham City was to see the newly erected LDS (Mormon) temple and took a couple of pictures there. Brigham City isn’t exactly ‘exotic’ for me so I didn’t take too many pictures while I was there. 

Here's my proof that I made it to Brigham.

On the return journey however, I had to snag a few of the road and scenery that I passed. I really need to get a more professional camera, I've been using my iphone’s camera for all these pics and want to upgrade to something with better focusing capabilities. If anyone knows about photography, I could really use a recommendation on an amateur camera.

This pic is my favorite. It was taken a small
ways from the I-15 overpass.  

My family’s taking a trip to St. George in southern Utah this   coming Wednesday to visit my grandparents, so I’ll try figuring out a good route somewhere around there with some awesome scenery of the Martianesque landscape!  So if not tomorrow or the next day, expect an account from me again by Thursday at the least.

This was the path I took from Plain City to
Brigham City. 

Country road.

The Will of the Wheel

The bike is here! I rode it ten miles to a Halloween party today out in Hooper and it rode like a dream the whole way. On the return journey my brain seemed to be racing against my body, as visions of far distant places and beautiful vistas rose before my mind's eye. If you want to know what utter freedom feels like, ride a bike. It's faster than running, there is no gas or oil that you need to constantly be badgered by and you don't need to worry about insurance or getting your inspections taken care of.  If you have a basic knowledge of bike mechanics, which I am currently working towards right now, you could be completely self-sufficient with only your own strength and wits to rely on.  

The Trek 7.3 Disc

As you might be able to tell, I'm pretty excited about this! I've already begun planning out small trips into Ogden and to Salt Lake City. Hopefully, before the first snowfall, I'll do an overnighter to Evanston, Wyoming. I do have one conundrum I'm trying to work out though. Come next spring, I was going to try my hand out traveling the States, however, I recently received news that the Japanese government is giving out ten thousand round trip tickets to Japan and back for free, the only catch is you have to blog about your trip and basically send a resume as to your blogging past and what your planned itinerary is in Japan and they will be taking applications this April. So if I want to go to Japan, I need to step up on this blogging game and get more people following my blog. 

Here's a pic of the book I've got and how thick it is.
Not some flimsy manual to say the least.

The Stateside venture can wait. Japan could quite possibly be a one time chance for me. Who else would be able to say they've rode a bike from Hokkaido to Kyushu? Which, actually, would probably be round about the distance from Ogden to Los Angeles. I've already decided that, as soon as I figure out a way to make some money, I'm going to buy me a Japanese Roseta Stone program and try to become conversant before April. (Giving my application in Japanese would definitely turn some heads I think.) 

If anyone has any tips or advice they'd like to give, I'm all ears; unless you try telling me not to do it, in which case you'll just be wasting breathe. Anyone who would be interested in following me, please click that little button. With your guys' support the misadventures of Wolfmutt will become much less mundane and more . . . intrepid.

The Purchase and the Journey.

The 2012 7.3 FX Disc. . .Oh yeah. In the next week or two I'll be receiving this beautiful creation of mechanical imagination that I will use to traverse a continent. Granted, I spent more money on it than I'd like to admit, but the possibilities that this little bike opens up to me are beyond the cost and is greater in worth. 

Now many of you may ask, why a bike? Why not just drive a car to where you want to go? It would be much faster and much easier to get around. My answers are simple. First off: money, money, money. Gas is just too much nowadays for a poverty-stricken individual, such as myself, to get anywhere on such a budget. Not to mention probable maintenance issues that could jack the price up exponentially. While on a bike, the only fuel you need to worry about is for your own body and the maintenance is much smaller, cheaper and easier to accomplish by yourself

Secondly, I want to be a writer and blogging while traveling is a great way to, not only get good practice but also to record and learn from my experiences and utilize them in my stories.

To be honest, the first two reasons are the only ones people would understand. Reason number three is a little more different of a perspective that not as many will probably share. I’m not one who likes to rush things. I like to take my time and enjoy the sights and places I visit. When I went to Vancouver last spring, I walked all over that city which gave me a much more intimate look at the city than if I were only to have driven through it. Biking, though I’ll have a set schedule on my travels, will allow me to have more time taking in the views and there are places I can go on a bike that I couldn’t in a vehicle.

My last reason is for the sheer freedom and adventure of it! I want to be able to look back on my life and say that I didn’t live the routine that everyone else lived. Not saying that the routine- school, work and family (of course, not necessarily in that order) - is a bad thing, it’s just not my thing. Eventually I’ll get to it, but I really need to satisfy this nomadic itch first. To ride hard for hours on end, sleep under a starry sky each night, and learn of the cultures around the world first hand.

Oh, and just to clarify what my next trip is going to be; I will be traveling the width of these United States from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic which will be starting off next May. I expect to be visiting most of the major cities from east to west and will be gone about six months by my current reckoning. But don’t think I’ll be doing a half-baked job on my preparations or anything. As soon as I get my bike, I’ll be taking “short” trips to nearby states until I learn from enough mistakes on what to bring and what not to bring that I’ll be ready for the long haul in May. I’ll be sure to keep the updates coming.  

Alright, I guess that’s enough yap out of me tonight. Happy trails then, until my next post.

Wolfmutt's First Run

Ever have one of those days where you feel like every ounce of energy has been sapped from your useless form and no matter what you try, nothing seems to pull you out of that slump all day? Yesterday I had one of those moments. Along with my newfound unemployment came a large amount of time that could have been put into great use and productivity if only gravity didn’t decide to double in pressure on top of me. I couldn’t write, I couldn’t draw, heck; I barely had enough strength to go on a four mile run which turned out to be one of my worst times in over a year.

            So thus I’ve decided to write a blog. How on earth did I come up with that conclusion, you ask? Well the answer is very simple. I haven’t the foggiest idea. Well, okay, maybe the fog has a bit of shape to it. There will come a time when I will be traveling around for a while and I want to keep a blog during my sojourns. So I figured it would be a good idea to start writing one now so that when I finally get things moving I’ll know my way around a blog. I was planning on keeping a blog when I visited Vancouver, Canada last spring but I never got into it soon enough and just ended putting updates on facebook the whole time. But it was a lesson well learned on several accounts and on my next trek, I’ll be ready.

            Now here’s a list of things you can expect when reading through my blog: drudging memoirs of my past day, week, or month, random thoughts that can span from politics to my favorite book or movie quotes, current story or art projects and updates on the progression towards my next travel destinations.

            Alright, I think that about covers it. It’ll be interesting to see how this goes. As the title of my blog states, this is going to be my mundane misadventures until I finally take off on my next trip. Wolfmutt was a name that popped in my head when creating the title that sounded like a good name for me. My favorite animal is a wolf and I’m a mutt, so there you have it.